Reviews : Albums : Plan E, "Best Kept Secret"

Plan E, "Best Kept Secret"
Plan E
Best Kept Secret
2003, Solardisk
Plan E, "Best Kept Secret"

The members of Plan E must be full of childish glee if their aim is to torture those that listen to their album Best Kept Secret. The disc is pure and total crap, even in comparison to some hum-dingers like Metallica's St. Anger. I don't understand how these Finns thinks they'll sell even a single copy of this shit. Seriously, who the hell in their right mind would try to mingle electronic goth with soft, fuzzy guitars, the stupidest vocal approach delivered in the past ten years and then write songs that might do better in the soundtrack of a David Lynch movie? THERE ISN'T A MARKET FOR GOTH-INSPIRED ELEVATOR MUSIC!!!!!! If you are tempted to check this band out, don't. Best Kept Secret has no musical value whatsoever and if I were supreme world dictator, I'd personally fucking execute all of Plan E for their gargantuan stupidity and further pollution of the already filthy musical world.

Peter Johnston